"I've had it. Pressure turns coal into diamonds? Well, the self-imposed pressure that I'm feeling right now is enough to form a diamond encrusted sword with which I will slay this wretched, soul sucking beast of debt. The Dragon will Die; I'm going to kill it, I'm going to eat it's heart and I'm going to mount it's head on my freakin' wall.The beast will die completely and finally on December 31st, 2008. There - I've set the goal. Does it sounds ridiculous? Absurd? The Impossible Dream? Yeahhhhh....so what. JFK asked the scientist who would later be responsible for the space program what it would take to put a man on the moon. The scientist said, "The Will to Do It." This debt is taking away my financial future, my financial present, my social life, my time with my kids, their financial future - think about all that on a daily basis and see if you don't find the damned will to do just about anything."
Wow....I got chills just reading that, didn't you? Okay, okay - maybe it was just a bug on my neck. But in any case, the words are somewhat inspiring - at least I felt that they were when I wrote them on August 11th, 2007. Problem is, it didn't take. 12/31/08 came and went with the Debt Beast still eating comfortably, having flicked away with its yellowed scraggly claw the tiny peon frantically waving his shiny little stick in the Beast's general direction.
Said peon would, of course, be me. And, while the ideological side of me reads those words and gets re-invigorated, the jaded side of me that's drudged through the last year and a half since that was written reads it again and says..."what a yutz".
I'm no further ahead then when I started this blog, and that's depressing. So what went wrong? Well first off, I didn't work as hard or as smart as I could have or should have. So I'm changing that. I'm raising my rates on jobs so that I actually (gasp!) see a profit when all is said and done. If a client changes their minds about something, a change order will be signed and the price will increase. All jobs will be put in writing and nothing that is not on the page will be done without a change order and more money. Now, this is nothing new - contractors have been doing this for ages, but Debt Daddy has not. I made the mistake of getting too friendly with my clients as well as not valuing myself or my work as it should be valued. That ends this year. To paraphrase, "I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and gosh darn it - people are gonna pay me for it".
What else went wrong? Underestimating my opponent. When I first got into this whole "slay the credit card beast" rigamarole, I imagined myself as Rocky in the first movie - the underdog going up against the Champ, Apollo Creed. I think I may have been able to win that one, or at least come out of it with a split decision. But debt comes in many forms, and it comes at you from several different directions at once and, before I knew it, I wasn't just fighting Apollo Creed, but Clubber Lang, Ivan Drago, and Tommy Gunn as well - and that was not a fight I was prepared for. I had prepared for a battle - I need to prepare for a war.
Another thing that sabatoged me - thinking that I could do it all on my own. Debt Daddy has always been of the mind that he didn't really need anyone else's help with anything, and admitting that he did was somehow a sign of weakness. Well, I'm trying to get over that feeling now, and make use of the resources around me. I have great friends that are offering advice and support as far as my business goes, and I'm taking it. I'm making an appointment with a financial counselor to sit down with my wife and I to examine our options (interestingly, this particular financial consulting company makes it a rule that they must speak with both spouses - not just one - to make sure that both parties are on board with debt elimination - I thought that was great); I'm even involving my wife more with my business. Turns out Debt Mommy has a gift for determining the true dollar value of my work. So far the quotes she's suggested, while being up to 30% higher than quotes I would have given, have been easily accepted by my clients, so I'm gonna keep running the jobs past her first. She's a keeper, she is.
I guess it's kind of like building a house. You can't build a house using only your hammer. You have to use many different tools, all working together to get the house built right. I'll beat this beast yet, but I can't do it overnight and I can't do it alone. It'll take time, it'll take help, it'll take perseverence and sweat, brains and guts, courage and tenacity....
It'll take every tool in the toolbox.
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2 comments:
I also got chills reading that. :) I like your terminology. "Debt Beast". We have one in our house.
My first cousin is an independent contractor who does a lot of contracting for the big three here in Michigan and he also gives too many breaks. Now he is loosing his house.
You are making a good move to "Change Order" this clients.
Good Luck
It's great that you and your spouse are on the same page in terms of debt elimination. It's doable...not easy but can be done. Took me 6.5 years and let me tell you there is no better feeling than being debt-free.
Don't give up! Get that beast outta the house b4 he grows up and has a family of his own.
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